8/27/17

Worst: WuMo

Alright so continuing the trend from yesterday our fellow suffering from both the Cardgage curse and the Arc of Covenant is trying to take a picture of the sun but geddit people in the past didn't care about how they looked but they do now so there's the strings attached. Gee it's like we evolve and so do cameras. Have these fuckers ever actually taken a well picture or do they just assume pressing the button automatically produces good results.

It wouldn't be a big deal but all it would have taken to get this clearer is the sun's first and third lines. Also maybe actually make good use of the caption that's absent here and just put it at the bottom?

 Best: Gasoline Alley

 Back when there were three pages of comics in the paper I hated Gaisolane Alley, but its starting to grow on me. I dunno why. I feel in the need to not become a flaming Entard and acknlowedge the good with the bad I am starting to get accustomed to the comics never changing and getting used to some of trhem.


...or more likely maybe I'm just glad it has never once been political and somehow still is not.
Oh yeah and there's actually some artistic skill in it.

Anyway here's what I like about this one:
* They actually are self-awar enough to acknowledge the subtle disturbingess of mice advertising cat food
* That written French accent
* It's a drema, not like that A Nonny Moose shit where theres just a moose in the real world
* Third panel is a beautriful use of black
* This unlike many GA strips has a punchline

8/26/17

Best: Soup to Nutz

This was one of the three strips I was REALLY scared to see get affected by the great comedy death of 2016, mainly because all three had already expressed very obvious "Le Sniffles McFatshame" jokes the last I read of them that year during the election. WuMo had not crossed my mind at the time and the other two we'll discuss in the future (spoiler: one of them does indeed blow ass now) but lets focus on this for now...

...wait.

It can't be.

Could it?

A KKK joke that coulda been printed before 2017 no problem? One that is...gasp...APOLITICAL?

I see skies of blue....

Of course we'll probably have those mad that they called them "dunces" at all but it's not like they in any way acknowledge what they do or that it applies to society. Hell it doesn't even say they exist today, he just said he watched "a show" and not the news which means it was almost certainly a history documentary.

And just to clarify, if you think its weird such a seemingly innocent strip would be talking about this at all, there's a reoccurring joke that they always piss of the minister at Sunday school. This strip is more than meets the eye.

 
Worst: WuMo

Alright this wasn't nearly a smidge as heinous a joke as yesterday's but if I'm gonna have to talk about WuMo right from day one I'd like to prove to you guys that my claim about it being literally nothing but "what if ___ was today" jokes is true by sacrificing the whole first week or so of "Worst" to it. Let's see how many days in a row we can get where the joke is just "the past would be different if we had the advancements we do today". 

The joke isn't worth any analyization beyond the points I touched upon yesterday (and hey literally anything beats mansplaining jokes) so let's get to the artwork:

First of all, we addressed yesterday this art style. This art style that makes all the humans look like the Cartoon Network Noods contracted rheumatism and developed a crippling addiction to wax lips.

(Oohh mama, you'd better believe I'm giving them a new description like this everyday I have to look at the little antichrists again)

It turns out the rabbit hole of the lips as I addressed in yesterday's strip actually goes even deeper.
I didn't pay enough attention yesterday but it turns out the black woman had brown lips.
Bond himself was the only character without them or even drawn in a tolerable style, which I originally assumed was to contrast him from the setting, but now that I see what I'm seeing today, was most likely only because they were directly using an image of a Bond (man, I hope it wasn't Moore) for reference.

Let us analyize the lip ratio of people:

• Only the women even have them. Already this is damn unfortunate because...well fellatio. (As well as making the fact that yesterday was most likely a pro-femenist joke damn tragic). It gets worse though....
• The white (or rather albino) woman is the only one with human lips, the rest as we observed yesterday sync to their skin tones.

...wow it was just a joke yesterday using "minstrel show" as part of my description but....

Also, just putting a phone in the hands? Could it have killed you to actually draw the Mona Lisa in the actual position a selfie creat-oh yes that requires forced perspective. Even you wouldn't stoop to having the whole painting be uncolored in to "simulate" perspective.

8/25/17

BEST: Pooch Cafe

This is actually one of the only NYDN strips I never read for some reason. Already I regret this decision.

There's only so many ways you can say "this joke was great" so best will probably be dominated by those I like the artwork on. Here's what I personally noticed:
* The forced perspective on the fishbowl. Man, most people woulda just made it flat and not even shown the fish.
* The line in the third. It looks really cool that it blended in with Poncho (as I am told his name is)'s body and is just behind his ear. Almost anybody else woulda just made this one big white streak.

WORST: WuMo

Alright, I guess I'll just have to be honest. I was hoping not to just spoil the big surprise on the first day, but upon discovering that this happened to be the strip for today, there really is no avoiding it. I was hoping that this blog would just build up in time and I could make the worst section change constantly and therefore be interesting, but I'll just have to tell you:

WuMo is most likely going to friggin' DOMINATE the worst section.

WuMo was the last comic strip ever added to the Daily News back in 2013, so damn long ago I was doing the FIRST incarnation of this blog then. It seems like an almost cruel twist of fate that it was added for no discernible reason, replacing a strip (Get Fuzzy) that had not ended and still has not to this day. Almost as if to say "yeah thats right we can replace them at any time BUT WE STILL DON'T CAUSE COMICZ IS DEAD"

I coulda made a whole blog about this strip, but I didn't. (And now I regret I do, I coulda called it Wumoology: The Study of WuMo. It's first grade.)

In my quest to avoid becoming a rabid cartoon ranter with this blog, I aim to analyze the artwork before and more urgently than the actual joke. So here's my comments on the artwork, most about the general strip at all times but some specific to this one:
* WuMo's general art style is fucking shit. It looks like Phineas and Ferb semi-consentually fucked a minstrel show and the baby became an anorexic. Why are the lips like this. Why do the second and fourth women have lips colored like their flesh.
* The woman in the background isn't even colored in. Yes it's probably supposed to signify she's in the background but that's what we have "shrinking things so they're in the background". Given she appears to be no further away than the first tan-lipped lady I find it more likely they really did forget to color her in.
* The text. That sweet so obviously computer-generated text. This is how it is in every single strip.
* The text bubble. Why does it look like an "h". Either make it a diagonal line or a zig-zag.

now onto the joke


As if you can't tell from this particular one the main theme of it is "Current things do in fact exist and would conflict with those things in the past". Every single strip.
And keep in mind it started in 2013 so it was the original trailblazer of doing such before all contempary media, let alone all comic strips, started falling in the same trap.

Somehow, I've thought about WuMo so little since I offically stopped reading the comics (I only started again today) I failed to consider that the two unholy forces may have COMBINED...
i.e. WuMo picking modern low-hanging-fruit topics.

And sure enough this is what happened.

Disregarding the whole "this fucking shit should be kept out of a comic strip and anything that aims to please for that matter", this joke is a spectacular failure.

The implication here (disregarding the hassle of whether or not we're supposed to agree with it) is that we're only now seeing James Bond as unPC all because he gets the part and doesn't part with it more than his part parts it.

Right, totally nobody saw it this way before.

It's not like MAD Magazine did a whole piece on this back in the 90s.

what this is

Hello everybody, my name is RasterOfMandomness. My biggest accomplishments in life at the moment are getting roughly 700,000 YouTube views for profanity over a SpongeBob episode (having more-or-less) jacked somebody elses script forand being mocked by a cartoon luchador for my poor photography skills.

Some of my actual fans might have the question, what did I do with YouTube before editing and where was I originally trying to go with the channel.

Well, for the majority of 2013 I had a deeper passion

the comic strips of the New York Daily News.
yes really.

I spent the entire year doing a blog wherein I made fun of them, originally starting with one particularly bad one entitled Between the Lines  but at my parents request expanded to all of them.

needless to say this was when I still regorously watched TV Trash Mr. Enter all them fucks so you can take a guess how bad my humor and "analysis" or lack thereof was.

even when I got rid of it the thought never left my mind. The only reason I got rid of it was because I finally realized trying to pass of a blog of such a nieche, overlooked subject matter was no way to get noticed socially. We had alas well passed the glory days of the late 2000s/early 2010s wherein blogs about comic satrips were cutting-edge, contemporary comedy. The urge never died, though I spent the next four years waiting for the day such a thing became retro ironically cool again.

We have not reached this day.

However, what we HAVE reached is newspaper comics somehow going down the shitter even further thanks to all of comedy turning into low hanging fruits.

This was actually what made me want to continue editing: the hopes that I would rack up a big enough fanbase to bring back the project.
Well it's safe to say I succeeded.

I promised that I would bring it back when I started college, and well that was today.

And what an apropos time to bring it being seeing as ever since I shut it down, THERE HAS NOT BEEN ONE FUCKING UPDATE OR CHANGE TO THE DAILY NEWS COMICS over the whole nearly four years.

I thought for a second: how can I bring it back without making it Enterbotian garbage?

Then I thought of this one blog (which appears to be gone) that selected the one best and worst comic in the Washington Post each day and explained why they deserved the status.

So yeah that's what I'm doing.

Updates will be everyday except Saturday.